Why Yes, I Am Wearing Green Eyeshadow

As I sat down to blog, I ran through several options...

I could blog on that everymommy moment you have while at a childs' birthday party where another parent is telling you how many times their children have thrown up in the past 48 hours. I could blog about how the ninjanizer thought it was funny to copy Dash and crawl while dragging his head along the carpet - only to give himself a wicked case of carpet burn across his nose and forehead. I could blog about how I swear the ninjanizer is going through puberty and I'm thinking of employing my grandmothers' methods and telling him that his junk will fall off if he doesn't stop playing with it. Or was it that he would go blind? I forget. I may use both.

But instead, I think I'll blog about what I consider to be one of the top three things I totally dig about being a woman. Makeup. Now I have to think of the other two... I'll go with having babies and (EARMUFFS TO FAMILY) multiple orgasms.

Anyway, it all started with a conversation between me and the ninjanizer the other day...

(While watching Katy Perry's "Hot and Cold" during morning music time)

Fin: Mommy, I like her makeup. It's green. I think she's a Ninjanizer.

Mommy: Maybe mommy should try that...

Now, I should know, between the black fingernail polish and the horrid orange toenail polish that I've been rocking lately, allowing the ninjanizer to make my fashion decisions isn't necessarily a sound plan. I mean, this is a kid who wants to put on his furry giraffe print uggs as soon as he gets home and then won't allow them to be pried off of his sweaty little feet until he's passed out cold. But still I needed to get out of the all-browns-and-beiges-with-a-hint-of-black rut I've been in, so green seemed as good a color as any I guess.

We had a costume-themed birthday party today and I figured that this was a good time to try some experimental makeup...

Self-portrait. Ignore the wrinkles.

So what do you think? I think it turned out pretty neat. I think I might try all blues tomorrow. Of course, that is if the kids will give me more than two seconds of peace in the morning!

The Ninjanizer's TV Viewing Habits

I have to start by saying that my kids don't watch a lot of TV. When the TV upstairs broke, that pretty much weaned us off of our biggest viewing times, in the early AM and before naps and bed. I enjoyed our few months without a bedroom TV and the kids and I started our day with music instead. I'm happy to say that the behemoth didn't change that much. Now we start our days with music videos instead.

(The only downside to that is that Fin is overly fond (read: obsessed) with the Britney Spears "Womanizer" video. Only he INSISTS that they're saying "Ninjanizer". So all day I hear "Ninjanizer, Ninjanizer, oh you're a Ninjanizer..." And no, he cannot explain to me what a Ninjanizer is although he seems to think he is one.)

Anyway, we don't watch a ton of TV. But with Brooks out of town this past week, I started putting movies on for them as a way to unwind before bed. I'm not big with censoring things for them. Fin loves Star Wars and will watch pretty much anything. He's never had a nightmare or really repeated any foul language.

(Although I would like to thank "It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown" for introducing the term "blockhead" and I could do without the attempts at "force choking" me when he's mad.)

One day a few weeks ago when we were watching "Oswald", there came an episode where his best friend, Henry, almost moved away. Fin was beside himself. I was almost unable to get him to calm down enough to watch the end of the show. He's a pretty sensitive kid.

Which should have been my first clue that he shouldn't watch Bambi.

In a fit of guilt over some of the more colorful things I have let him watch lately (I did distract him from watching when the alien jumped out of the dude's chest), I decided that we'd try and stick to some Disney movies. I gave him some options and he, of course, chose Bambi.

So I'd like to thank Disney for my son's panic over hunters and where Bambi's mother went.

I scanned my kids shelf. Nemo, Dumbo, Fox and Hound, Land before Time, Aristocats...I could go on and on. All these movies involve sinister plots (usually by people) to kill/eat/wear the animals. There is parental danger/death/abandonment left and right. And I should be worried about my kid watching Star Wars? Seriously WTF?? The only movies I have on the "safe side" side of the shelf are The New Adventures of Pippi Longstocking and Labyrinth.

And a Pippi viewing results in a week of "running away" threats.

Thankfully Brooks is back at home. He's got some magic mojo going on that enables him to get the kids to sleep in the blink of an eye (Ninjanizer, Ninjanizer, yeah he's a Ninjanizer).

But we're going to watch Iron Man tonight anyway.

Um, Can I Get Some Family Time Please?

So I'm sitting in bed, letting Peter Pan babysit the kids (hey, it's better than Alien, which I let Fin watch last week) and having a little pity party for myself over being a single parent for a few days. Woob is again in Seattle, working hard, and majorly pissing me off for not being here when 1)Dash ate it outside and scraped up his face and hand 2)Dash peed before getting in the tub. All over the bathmat. and 3)Dash threw UP in the tub. While still in it. With Fin. And did I mention that Dash woke up at 2:30 and didn't go back to sleep. Like, yet. And then Fin was up at 6:30.

(EAT ME DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME!)

Needless to say, things just don't run smoothly around here with Woob out of town.

I was thinking about how my father never went on business trips and was always home for dinner - even if that meant that during tax season he had to go back to work afterwards. And it made me wonder, WTF has happened to family time?

I can't think of one guy I know who doesn't work late most nights - that 'late' may vary from not being home for dinner to not being home to kiss his lady goodnight. But I don't know anyone who makes it home for a 'family dinner'. And most of the working folks I know do have some travel.

Speaking of travel, WTF is up with business travel. Airfares are through the roof and buying them at last minute makes it that much worse. Why isn't everyone doing teleconferencing? I mean seriously that is SUCH a waste of money! But I digress...

I HATE business travel. But Woob, like most I'm sure, has to compete with co-workers who don't have significant others, or families, or kids. So he doesn't have the luxury of saying, no, I'm not going on that business trip. There's always another worker who will be happy to go and take the job. I totally get that. But man do I HATE business travel.

So when are we supposed to get in any family time? You have to just mark off one weekend day for chores and around-the-house stuff. So one weekend day is all that's left? And that's presuming that your children don't have any activities that eat that day too.

That's just not enough.

(Now imagine me jumping up and down and stomping my feet)

So how do you do it? How do you get in your family time? And how can we fix our culture to value that more and come up with a way for people to work condusive hours?

Off to put the kiddies to bed by myself (and again wonder why Woob can do it in minutes and I get sucked in to hours of snuggles, drinks, potty breaks and more snuggles...)

Halloween Helper

The hubs is notorious for his craftiness - especially when it comes to All Hallows Eve. He's always bugging me to let him make costumes for us and the kiddos and so this year I thought of a way to pick out my own costumes for the boys and still give him the freedom to design his own. I found the worlds cutest bee costumes at Pottery Barn Kids (thanks mama for buying them for us!) and told the hubs to get crackin on a bee keeper get-up.

There were some brief shopping foray's for supplies, but last night the boys went to bed and the hubs turned to me - defeated - and lamented that he hadn't had time to do anything about his costume. Reminding him that at least it was only his own hiney that needed costuming and that the boys were covered, I told him not to worry about it. When I got up this morning he showed me a bee keeper hat that he had made and...well, it was clearly a midnight, last-minute adventure.

While I knew he would have been fine in his half-hearted garb, it made me so sad that he hadn't had the chance to devote the time to make it as great as he wanted. So, once he left for work, I set out to make some improvements. One trip to Osh, one to Beverly's and a whole lotta sewin' on bees while Dash slept in my lap...





















Bees and their Keeper...

Mmmm Tasty Honey....

Bees...




















Bee Hat...

Have Pig, Will Travel

Dash pushes his "car" around all day, so I guess it was natural that this be where he put his piggie!